You Can Fly as High as You Want to Fly
(excerpt from a Vernon Howard talk, 1991)
So tell yourself and the divine spirit – “I want more than anything else – Authentic Life”. I want it more than my self-centered dramatics. Cease to call unlife – Life.You have to do the work. And you have to do it ALL ALONE. You do not need those people at all. No human being, system can help you. You do not want true life until you understand that – you want your definition of life, not AUTHENTIC LIFE. The world can only give you low-level promotions and your present thinking matches the world’s. YOU CANNOT REFER TO YOURSELF ANYMORE. Break out of yourself. Get over your stupid bad habit of allowing thoughts/stormy emotions to take you over. Calmly say – “Well, what do you know, I have nothing of value inside of me. Cheerfully see that you don’t know what to do at all. Exhaust all your answers. The “NO ANSWER BANK” – It is there so that you can have a very personal/authentic relationship with God.
(excerpt from a Vernon Howard talk, 1991)
So tell yourself and the divine spirit – “I want more than anything else – Authentic Life”. I want it more than my self-centered dramatics. Cease to call unlife – Life.You have to do the work. And you have to do it ALL ALONE. You do not need those people at all. No human being, system can help you. You do not want true life until you understand that – you want your definition of life, not AUTHENTIC LIFE. The world can only give you low-level promotions and your present thinking matches the world’s. YOU CANNOT REFER TO YOURSELF ANYMORE. Break out of yourself. Get over your stupid bad habit of allowing thoughts/stormy emotions to take you over. Calmly say – “Well, what do you know, I have nothing of value inside of me. Cheerfully see that you don’t know what to do at all. Exhaust all your answers. The “NO ANSWER BANK” – It is there so that you can have a very personal/authentic relationship with God.Walk with the Spirit. Conquer the entire world in a different way. You don’t have to know where you are going – just know where you have been. You are worried sick – see that you have no security to lose. Know that you cannot trust yourself again. That is a prayer, an invitation. You will lose the false life that has tormented you since you were a child.
This has been the only true relief, reward. You know that from yourself. Trust, follow ONLY THAT. All else will betray you – by betraying God. You have a responsibility and a noble duty to transform your nature.
***
Thank God I can choose to come to an end of myself! All my answers – EXHAUSTED! It is my “noble duty” to transform my nature… Just do it!
What really strikes me about this excerpt is the fact that Vernon says you don’t actually want a true life until you realize that you want your version of life rather than an authentic life. It’s baffling to me because it’s so true, but going into the Work principles at first you are just so sure that you don’t want to be sick anymore and that you actually want to get better, but you don’t. What a great shock to see that there are some chief delusions that must go in order for you to rightly begin your true life.
Break out even though 99% of me wants to hang on to ridiculous, useless, fear and negativity.
So beautiful that we have to do it all alone and be independent from everyone else. That also means that nobody else has the power to hurt us, but that we are responsible for our own negative states and circumstances. How empowering! We truly do have the means to change ourselves and our lives.
Yes, we do have a responsibility and a noble duty to change our nature. But don’t think of it as heading down into the salt mines to work at hard labor because even though it does take hard work there is nothing more exciting and spirit lifting than to see yourself causing your own self grief and suffering. Why?, because when you see this in yourself, what sees it is not a part of that grief and suffering and something happens to you inside…you start to have fun again. And I mean real fun because you are finally on to something with substance and your overwhelmed by right emotions, like joy and feeling everything is all right with you. Oh yes, the outer world is still in chaos, but you have an inner peaceful safe haven which the world cannot disturb. You must experience all this for yourself and then you will know this is not just a bunch of hot air. Climb. Good Luck!
It is such a grand relief to know that you sit in a cage and clip your own wings because this is the idea of life you have considered for yourself but to no longer be in the cage and no longer seek the false security of the cage you can conquer the skies with a new and beautiful nature.
Thank you!
That was really nice Bryan!